Science, mathematics and to some extent, philosophy, operate by some predictions based on identified conditions or relationships. At the core are two relationships, constants and variables. Constants indicate those factors that don’t change with time or circumstances; and variables, are those that change with time and circumstances. For example, when determining speed, they look at the constant of distance and manipulate it’s relationship with the variable of time.
How these two are related and the conditions presented, may determine how a scientist predicts the rate of speed. The same goes for predictions of weather, seasons and geographical movements and structures by meteorologists, of planetary or spatial explorations by astrologers, and etc. Life is also made up of constants and variables. Those things about and around you that you cannot change are constants, and those you can change or manipulate, are variables.
Confidence is also a science. To build confidence, identify and major in your constants (such as personality, height, weight, tribe, color of skin, and etc.) and ACCEPATANCE of these factors must be total and unequivocal; then reflect on your variables (such as nationality, poverty or richness, educated or uneducated, married or single, employed or unemployed, happiness or sadness, hope or disappointment, weight and nationality – which could be both variables and constants – goals and dreams, and etc.) and TOLERANCE of these and manipulating them depending on how they relate to the constants are important.
Thus, you can ACCEPT the fact that you are White or Black (constant) but refuse to be poor (variable); or accept the fact that you have a reserved personality (constant) but choose to be an excellent speaker or preacher (variables), and so on. Rule of thumb: Accept things about you that you can’t change and improve within their limits; but decide to manipulate or change or adjust or manipulate the variables (things you can change) to make them fit or adapt to the things you can’t change (or constants). In the end, you will win and feel extremely confident.”
The biggest mistake and which will be the cause of anxiety, stress, depression, unfulfillment, misery, disillusionment, and even death, is to reverse the order; trying to change constants and major in variables. Those who do this will be extremely unhappy in life. They will, probably, spend a great deal of their lives sad, lonely, moody, unfulfilled and even irritable. They will always blame themselves for everything, and sometimes even blame God for who they are (instead of appreciating just the way they are and giving God the praise). They will waste time, money, energy trying to “measure up to the standard” set for them by the culture around them.
The fact is, in one’s constant, one is more and naturally comfortable. Within that natural, comfort zone, one can achieve greatly and be at liberty. The definition of the so-called ideal (ideal weight, height, educational level, right color, and etc.) is usually a construct of the commercially, profit-motivated and culturally dominant groups, because by creating a fake ideal standard, they could control trade, demand and create an appetite for the mundane. The aim is to generate sales or domination, no matter who gets injured (mentally or culturally) in the process.
Variety is the currency that the Creator used to design His creation – thus, not all flowers are pink or blue or red or white or black or yellow or brown, and not all weights are big or small, and not all heights are tall or short, and not all races are Black or White, and not all countries are in Europe or America or Asia or Africa, and not all things are the same. Variety brings a synergy of diversified excellence, where one kind blends with another to produce a rhythmically buoyant and flamboyant end-product. The core of desire is, therefore, not homogeneity, but complementarity. And as such, a person should be preoccupied with the improvement, within their kind and not to imitate another kind, of who they are. The goal of improvement within one’s kind is the essence of creativity.
Therefore, if one wants to be happy with and about who they are, they ought to accept who they are, first and foremost, and then work within the prevailing variables to improve their core, which is the constant.
For example, don’t desire to be short if you are tall and don’t desire to be tall if you are short. But within your kind, improve yourself. There is a scientific concept of entropy. In a layman’s language, entropy defines a state of disorder if no external forces improve upon something. In other words, a thing or matter, intrinsically, gradually declines into disorder if not tended after a long while. If you leave a car in a garage locked up in its top-of-the-cut cleanliness, when you return after a long while, you will find that it has gathered dirt.
Thus, sustainability comes with use and not neglect. If you are a White person and you don’t tend to your skin, it will decay, and that same thing goes for a Black person. So, it is utterly foolishness to try and become Black or White if you can’t appreciate and accept the constant factor about you, namely, the color of your skin. The same thinking goes to weight, height, nationality, personality, character and similarly-situated factors.
Like driving, if you stay within your lane, you are likely to arrive alive. If you want to drive in another’s lane, you may end up unhappy, sad or dead. Similarly, if you can be, and appreciate, and accept who you are and stay in your natural lane you are, you will increase the chances of being happy and confident in life.
In your constant, you are an original, and a standard to yourself. You improve, limit or exceed your standard at your own terms. You are happiest and at your best when you are who you are. That’s the source of all your confidence.
Charles Mwewa
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